“Brave” Jeffery Toobin Wrestles One-Eyed Trouser Snake Live on Zoom Call
“He repeatedly strangled the tiny beast and tried to rip its head off”
Chief legal analyst for CNN & Reporter for the New Yorker Jeffery Toobin has been applauded for his snake-handling skills after he was seen wrestling a one-eyed trouser snake. Toobin claims he was sitting on a zoom call with fellow New Yorker staff and WNYC radio simulating scenarios for the upcoming presidential election when a venomous one eye python slithered up his trousers.
One witness who was on the call says she saw what appeared to be Jeff jump up out of his chair, unbuckle his belt and drop his trousers. He then was seen fumbling around while biting his bottom lip eluding that something was up and grabbed the one-eyed snake by the head. Viewers then witnessed Jeff attempt to repeatedly strangle the tiny beast and try to rip the snakes head off. The unconscious reptile was then stuffed back down his trousers and was never seen again.
Toobin is now known around the office as the ‘Steve Irwin’ of Zoom calls and that denies any claims that his suspension from his position as a reporter at The New Yorker and any rumours circulating he was actually rubbing one out is totally not true and created by Russian hackers. Probably.
